Back To The World
Today (Friday) I'm sad. Gina is leaving.
On Wednesday Gina and I made dinner for a gathering that included just a few of my favorite people. I wondered what it would be like to have them all around me at once. I guess at this point I'm creating a family in whatever way I can, if I can, and some of my friends live far away. But sometimes my heart feels like it could contain the ocean, there's so much room left in it. I wish JCP could have been there.
The next day we — the lovely Gina and I — went to the hardware store to get a watering can and some sunflower seeds. The guy who helped us was very cute in his short green apron. He seemed confused about why we'd want a watering can (???!), but then he sorted it out & took us to the back of the store, where there was a little nursery. Next to the watering cans we found a basket of yellow flowers. It's hanging in my window, right now. 
Have you ever worn a ring for a while and then taken it off & felt its absence? It's Friday - damn! - and Gina's going, and what's missing right now is me. Which is my purpose here, in this house full of windows and rooms and greenery. I'm refilling, and refilling is painful. Back to the bookstore, back to reading, back to unpacking, back to cooking, back to listening to music, back to the world. 
Gina and I are about to go to Golden Gate park for one last walk. I'll try not to cry, because man, I had a great week!
posted by 
ing at 10:11 AM
10 Comments:
I feel empty every time I have to leave my BFF's house and come back home. Hang in there.
11:38 AM
Yes, hang in there dove. Or, "hang tough" as I'll say. Or, "say CHEESE!".
I'm thinking there's more to look forward to.
I'm sitting in Ohio with a couple of hours to burn, wearing my well worn jeans.
Fill yourself with more eye candy from that hardware store or else I will detail for you the midwest girth.
Hugs,
-g
6:02 AM
Pants:
Me too, I feel empty, but at the same time I feel very full. It's been such a nice week, and I have such amazing friends!
_______________
ginab:
Oh, I always hang tough. You know I do. (Isn't cheese yummy?)
Ginab, there is much more to look forward to. This neighborhood is so lovely, and T got caught in the Pride Parade (as did I), and it's cold and purty and I live in a neighborhood full of brand-new people.
I am glad you escaped Ohio with your suitcase and your jeans intact. My own jeans are still crisp and blue. My loverly neighbors just broke a bottle of . . . I have no idea what - Belvedere? - on their front steps. I'm drowning them out with The Incredible String Band, which is extremely hippy-dippy of me. So far, the awesome mother of the house hasn't told them to "shut the fuck up, bitch!," and Nibbles's nails are still hot pink and she's still safe from that cliff.
As for eye candy, I am astounded. I do love beards.
xx
ing
1:29 AM
Well, I'm glad T feels better. You too!
My plane was delayed so I missed choosing between two parades of sorts. Even today, invited out to a lake, no can do! Must retrieve Beabs, the poor dear, thanks to northwest. (another roadtrip!).
The sun is out, and it's cool up here in the trees. Can't wait to walk bea bea through the woods and to come out on the street where men cycle by bare-legged-like.
8:06 AM
Gina:
Bare legs: yes!
I'm off to get coffee and to read and to admire shoulders and beards. Later, yoga. It's a good day to read, and to write things down. Soon, my improv class starts, and my Sundays will be busy.
Is Bea Bea mad at you now? Did you feed her some waffles?
11:48 AM
Here's hoping you feel better...
Improv class? You actually learn to improvise? I thought you just, you know, improvised?
7:44 AM
You two together? It'll balance the rest of the whole state of California...just you two, from all the yahoos down south on this end. For a time, there was...equalibrium.
I like the photos!
--Dan L.
2:35 PM
I love the photos--especially the "full bloom" one! Sounds like you had too much fun, cherish the memories as you return to work.
9:15 AM
I LOVE those pictures!!!!
It was so cool to meet Ms. Gina at long last!!!! Like you, she is the ultimate in cool!
And, B and I had the two hottest women in the Bay Area in our apartment for pizza and a few drinks & smokes!
Gina needs to just move here!
I was so pleased I was able to keep the two of you from being escorted to prison after what you both got up to --- good thing I know the right people, eh?
I get sad when my loved ones leave.
Actually, I get sad every time I say goodbye to you!
love and kisses from down the road,
matty
7:15 PM
ren:
No, improvisation must be LEARNED! (Well, people who are somewhat self-conscious [like me, for instance] do better with a little practice.)
_______________
dan l.
Did we really balance out the state? I guess if Gina were to move to SF, the next governor wouldn't have to worry about the budget, yeah?
________________
matty:
Cool, eh? Ginab is the ultimate, it's true. And the two of us together. . . it's a huge tornado of coolness, verging on a blizzard of coldness, which could lead to an Antarctic glaze of iciness!!
Except we are hot. And we eat fattening foods and occasionally even smoke cigarettes. Well, not me. Not any more. (No, I haven't given up pizza.)
As for prison, I think you disappointed a few of the inmates with your maneuverings, but thanks for saving our virginities, and sacrificing your own in the process. . .
Heck, I get sad every time I think about having friends, because nothing lasts forever and ever. (I try not to think about it.)
7:14 PM
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