This blog is welcome to anyone and everyone, regardless of race, class, gender, sexual orientation, or political affiliation. Unless you don't like writing short stories or smelling bear. Or if you voted for the other guy. Also, I don't really like it when you leave up the toilet seat, so could you stop doing that? Muchas, muchas gracias.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Confused Pianist

Come back from Texas! San Francisco isn't the same without you, my truest.


Blogger josh williams said...

What in the Sam Hill? Someone has stolen your blog, he looks familiar, is he a criminal? I hate criminals, wait, I know him...Dang he aint a criminal, but could you please ask him to lay off the piano, its paining my hammer and anvil parts.

7:51 PM

Blogger ing said...

Yes, he is a criminal. If you let him into your house, watch out for your Barbra Streisand collectibles and memorabilia. He'll probably leave your Liza Minelli stuff alone, but guard the Barbra.

10:03 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Play Misty for me.

6:00 AM

Blogger ticharu said...

Ing jewel, do you think we have the same hair thing goin on? Like colorwise? Do you think there's any truth to notion that red hair is a recessive gene left to us by the Neandethal?
Can Matt PLAY a piano or does he just look good trying?
Do you mind when people ask a lot of questions? Like, what time is it? Have you got a light? Full spectrum? Are those YOUR cabages? I think the one in the middle just said something, did you hear it?

4:33 PM

Blogger ticharu said...

Wait! There it said something again!

11:03 AM

Blogger ing said...


Your comment cracked me up!

Here's a Daniel Johnston reference for yez.



Well, my hair is reddish, going on gray. I'm not so lucky as to have your gorgeous color; I enhance a little. The sun brings out my red. I have green eyes, too. It might be a recessive-gene-thing.

Matt plays a mean version of chopsticks, and he looks good no matter what he's doing. He's no redhead, mind you, but he's cute nevertheless.

So far my cabbages haven't said a word, but I'm listening. I could use some practical advice. But I wouldn't take anything they said to me as gospel. Cabbages are a bit utilitarian.

1:22 PM

Blogger matty said...

You know, I often think of myself as a confused pianist. Then, I realize I am just out of tune.

I would never "steal" someone's Barbra collectibles. ...Unless they have something I don't.

I will play Misty for Gina if she will come and visit you!!!

I am home!!! I shall be calling you as soon as my stoopid phone charges up and I can get a signal!!!!

I swear! I can hear cabbage scream as it boils. Wish I had a Cabbage Head doll. I would not keep her in a box. No. I would set her free. I would hug her. I would love her. She would be my treasured doll! I would, however, part with her for the right price.

1:46 PM

Blogger ticharu said...

I bid $1.50!

4:53 PM

Blogger matty said...

Oh, I think my Cabbage Doll would be worth much more than a buck fifty. In fact, I suspect she would fetch quite a bit on EBay. And, if I could get Ing to make her a pretty dress for me! ?????

...I wanted to call Ing today, but she was napping. I hate it when that happens.

5:53 PM

Blogger josh williams said...

I just bought a second home, one to live in one to entertain guests, I keep all my collectables in my real home, my stunt/guest home from the card table and metal chair movement, with about two working beer keg coolers. Posters bound to the wall with push pins, clear push pins I do have taste after all even in my stunt home. My real home, I cannot reveal its where abouts, well only to a few in case I forget where I live.

9:24 PM

Blogger matty said...

Oh, Commander Josh -- your secret would be safe with Ing and her faithful readers! Tell us where you live and all about the art hanging on the walls. ...and, does your cabbage speak? I suspect Ing is still napping.

10:31 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...


7:18 PM

Blogger Dan L. said...


Gina said I need to tell ya 'bout THE WHO...I think you know a thing or two already about them. They are the BOMB, and more.

You and Gina are fun.

Have a very, super and great Thanksgiving, OK?

You should know your blog is fun...

We plan on it (Thanksgiving), all seven in our little home...Thanksgiving!

Peace, Ing,

--Dan L.

10:49 PM

Blogger matty said...

I like being the confused pianist. ...I just hope no one shoots me.

...don't shoot the piano player!

...especially if he is confused!

9:14 AM

Blogger Bunyan, Paul Bunyan said...

I know where Josh lives, in a hole in the ground with a bunch of ground hogs. You should hear the things hes saying about me on the dueling site, lies I tell you lies, if he keeps it up I'll tell you where his home is and his stash. I like the Pianee it makes song sound good.

1:32 PM

Blogger ing said...


I would boil her!!









Your stunt home sounds like a little bachelor-paddish. So I'm guessing your real home is decorated with ruffles and flower prints?


In solidarity with Matty:

Yes, yes, send me your address! I will not tell a soul!



Hoot Who. Row P.


Dan L.:

Peace to you to. But WHO is this Who everyone keeps mentioning? I'm supposed to see them in Grand Rapids. Are they one of those barbershop quartets? I love barbershop quartets. They keep me focused when I'm at the barber's. Will they give me a shave, too? And a wax?

I'm spending Thanksgiving with my friend of friends. He will come see my new apartment for the first time, so I've already started cleaning. By the time he visits, it will be SPOTLESS!!



If anyone tries to shoot you, I will deflect the bullets with my Wonder Woman bullet-deflecting brassiere.

Pretty nice, eh? 36DD. (In case you were wondering.)



I've already gotten halfway through the stash, so you're too late there. That Indiana stuff isn't very potent.

6:43 PM

Blogger lryicsgrl said...

R U going to WHO??
I hope soooooo, then we will not need to "splain" all this to you!!!

I love your garden.....good luck with it. How lucky to have such wonderful friends (Matty and Gina, and a friend to buy you drinks, and share your hangover!!)

Well, not lucky exactly; you must be deserving ;-)

6:51 PM

Blogger ticharu said...

$2.50! Does she look like the Virgin Mary?

4:31 PM

Blogger matty said...

If I had a Cabbage Patch daughter --- she would look like Kathy Bates and have a little sledge hammer. She would be cool but a bit angry.

Ing would make her cool jump suits and stylish hats.

She would sell for approx $4K on ebay.

Today I hung 4 Barbra Streisand LP's on the wall! I think it 'a-scared' B, but he seemed at peace with it. It is my shrine to Perfection.

a confused pianist in need of a new profile picture. ...he grows weary of this one. Tho, it was a great song!

7:51 PM

Blogger Labbie said...

Mr. John's got nothing on this one...

BTW: Did you miss me?

7:13 PM


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