This blog is welcome to anyone and everyone, regardless of race, class, gender, sexual orientation, or political affiliation. Unless you don't like writing short stories or smelling bear. Or if you voted for the other guy. Also, I don't really like it when you leave up the toilet seat, so could you stop doing that? Muchas, muchas gracias.

Saturday, December 24, 2005

The Best Def Leppard Remix In The Known Universe

Merry whatever you celebrate, and X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X O X. Because if you didn't think Def Leppard could be more glamorous than they originally were, think again, suckas.



Blogger matty said...

Ah, Def Leppard! True rock of ages...

1:18 AM

Blogger jungle jane said...

i nailed the neighbour's dog to a crucifix in honour of jesus. i feel whole again...

3:43 AM

Blogger ginab said...

nailed offers too many euphemisms.

Otherwise, merry on!

4:17 AM

Blogger jungle jane said...

it was good honest old fashioned steel nails, gina. applied with a big fuckin hammer....

4:58 AM

Blogger ing said...

The size of the hammer doesn't matter. It's the quality of the nail.

7:53 AM

Blogger ginab said...

nailed, nailed, Nailed!. euphemisms, euphemisms, eu-phem-ism-zzzzzS.


8:49 AM

Blogger ing said...

Gimme a drill. And why hasn't anyone poured some sugar on me yet?

9:01 AM

Blogger E.L. Wisty said...

It may well be the best Def Leppard remix in the Def Leppard category, but is Def Leppard any good? Then again, I am sure to be prejudicial. I can't name a single song of theirs. Thumbs up for this as a Christmas post idea!

"Nailed"...I just discovered recently that it can have a sexual meaning. Sounds very macho. Would this be the sense it's used in Def Leppard?

Hope you are having a wonderful Christmas day!

9:04 AM

Blogger josh williams said...

I got an antique maul for Christmas and a couple of shirts. Praise Jesus. and warm and fuzzys to ya'll. My self I am going to ponder my new antique maul. JW

9:21 AM

Blogger ing said...

Well, Wisty, the Lep isn't for every girl. But for me, they bring back fond memories of high school dances. Like wondering what to do while my partner's writhing on the gym floor, playing his air guitar. Do you just sort of continue to dance around him?


Be careful with that maul!

9:33 AM

Blogger Anne-Marie said...

Happy Christmas to you as well!


12:52 PM

Blogger matty said...

ing -- pouring some Christmas sugar on you as I type!

3:43 PM

Blogger wind-up-man said...

Def Lep recorded well they are clean sounding turned up to 11! Have drill will travel...HaHa

5:04 PM

Blogger ginab said...

Bump and grind, teeny bopper, and dance on top of yer beau!

Big hair, though, requires a special license. Check at the door.

5:44 PM

Blogger Nabonidus said...

Yep, I remember this stuff, takes me waaay back! And as far as pouring sugar on you, I could crumble up some sugar cookies to pour on you!xoxoLisa

6:44 PM

Blogger jungle jane said...

i dig Def Lepperd man. reggae rules...

11:47 PM

Blogger ticharu said...

I reserve any opinion about Def Leppard however I noticed Yma Sumac & Huun Huur Tu in yer music profile! Girl! GIRL!!!

4:25 AM

Blogger ing said...


Yma Sumac -- the voice of the sun gods. And a four-octave range, my god . . . It's uncanny.

Huun-Huur-Tu -- I saw these guys live at a teeny little venue in Felton, California, and live, they practically knocked my beer out of my hand. Infuckingcredible. Aside from their voices, I think their coolest instrument is the dazhaanning khavy, which is a rattle made from sheep kneebones and a bull scrotum. I love saying "sheep kneebones."

Def Lep -- can I have some cheese on that cracker? Make it the kind of cheese that comes in a can, please.

8:44 AM

Blogger ing said...

The strangest thing happened to me this morning. I woke up and the sun was streaming in through the windows and I was buried in a mountain of sparkling sugar. Matty, Nabonidus, ginab: did you sneak in through the air vents again while I was sleeping?

9:32 AM

Blogger ginab said...

Did you get your wings, stamped MNG?

12:42 PM

Blogger josh williams said...

Def Leppard! I loved their version of "Wind Beneath my WIngs"!

1:47 PM

Blogger Chuck Dawson said...

Weird. I woke up in something that resembled donut glaze, but it smelled like sea water and it was all over my face!

2:09 PM

Blogger crusher said...

I didn't nail anything to a cross, this year. Santa did bring me a flashlight and a roll of duct tape though.

2:11 PM

Blogger Omar said...

Damn! Def Leopard didn't sang "wind beneath my wings"! Even I know that!

Def Leopard sung "Oh Cheri".

-no time is a good time for goodbye.

2:15 PM

Blogger ticharu said...

Seeing Huun Huur Tu would be a real treat! I understand Yma made some film appearences, but I've not seen them either. I'm looking...

4:12 PM

Blogger jungle jane said...

i like to masturbate listening to Def Leppard...

11:26 PM

Blogger ing said...


Yes, and my halo, too.


Me too, me too! Did I ever tell you you're my heeee-eee-roooooo?




Good for patching the pipes in that dark basement, I presume.


You've been wrong before, don't be wrong anymore.


Me too! Yma Sumac's got those great silent-film-star eyes.


Whatever floats your boat, I guess.

12:12 AM

Blogger ticharu said...

I downloaded a piece by ACD called 'pipedream' (I think) it was great anyway, kinda like the Residents and Ween. Thanks for pointing them out!

4:20 AM

Blogger ginab said...

Chuck- projectile vomit the holiday meal!

Ing- sorry. I am glad you got your wings!

Matt and nabonidus-howdy partners!

Jane-(try Bach).

7:41 AM

Blogger Bonfire Jones said...

Hey Ing! Thanks for your comments on my Imprint Memories post!

Hope you had a great Holiday & am looking forward to hearing more from you in 2006.

Beep-Beep & Beep-Beep Yeah! Ed

10:28 AM

Blogger jungle jane said...

Gina, Country & Western music does nothing for me...

12:27 PM

Blogger ginab said...

Jane, neither does your humor.


12:48 PM

Blogger josh williams said...


2:23 PM

Blogger Chuck Dawson said...

Do you really think my shirt's too tight? I have another one, I'll be right back.

5:44 PM

Blogger ing said...

Chuck: a little too tight, yes.

Gina: heyyyy - oooooh!

6:56 PM

Blogger ing said...

Jesus, Chuck, quit primping your mullet and change!

9:17 PM

Blogger josh williams said...

One of my favorite deaf leper lyrics!

Drunken ferry boat woman
swayin' on your sea
if I turn on the gasfire
by the rain rattled window
won't you sail over to me

The hail storm tumbles
the rail line rumbles
you move in the porch with me
on an overcast day
the pale winter city
an afternoon's debauchery

Your blouse your skirt
I'll undo them so gentle
with beautiful care
I'm a lonely man
with five bottles of wine
I'd like you to share

The hail storm tumbles
the rail line rumbles
you move through the doors with me
on an overcast day
the pale winter city
an afternoon's debauchery

Orange street light
afternoon becomes night
you drink your wine from a mug
there's cats at the backdoor
the snow is two inches
you roll down your tights on the rug

The hail storm tumbles
the rail line rumbles
you lie on the floor with me
come closer my love
I'm badly in need
of an afternoon's debauchery

9:58 PM

Blogger ing said...

Why Josh Williams, I do declare, if I didn't know full well that Joe Elliott of Def Leppard wrote "Debauchery" for the woman he later married, Candi Centura, I'd think you posted those lyrics just for me, and I'd be swooning.

11:19 PM

Blogger ticharu said...

I just listened to some squashed snipits of nmh at the Barnes & Noble site, not a fair hearing, but they remind me of Syd Barrett, so that makes them OK.
I must admit, I didn't hear much popular music during the 80's or the 90's, classical mostly...

3:22 AM

Blogger ginab said...

muy, muy romantica.

5:52 AM

Blogger ing said...


I never listened to classical at all. Wish I'd grown up in a musical family.


isn't it, though?

11:17 AM

Blogger josh williams said...

That forign guy on Amazon with all the David Gray reviews is a fraud.

1:36 PM

Blogger ing said...

Man, you think you know people, and then it turns out that you don't. Sorry, Josh. He had me fooled, too.

2:19 PM

Blogger ginab said...

Frauds, geezuz, they're every where pretended to be otherwise and elsewhere and in the know with so-and-so and diving in without getting nary a hair wet and walking off eating hearts while teeing up. Lily whites, I call them. Lily Whites.

3:43 PM

Blogger josh williams said...

ing: I would have written sooner but I had a deadline from Amazon on a review of Old Man and the Sea. It left me pretty much spent. Sorry about the fraud reviewer, I didnt mean to bust your bubble. JW

7:02 PM

Blogger ginab said...

South Richmond Hill, NY

9:13 PM

Blogger matty said...

Wait, did Def Lep really do a cover of "Wind Beneath My Wings" ??!?!?! If so, I must hear it!

Last night I watched a stunning tranny perform "Contempt Beneath My Wings" as sipped Diet Coke and played with some odd food that sort of tasted good, but then not.

12:45 AM

Blogger ing said...

"Contempt Beneath My Wings" -- HA!

3:32 AM

Blogger jungle jane said...

nice spots...

5:07 AM

Blogger Willy Jo said...

yer blob packs ass. i cant see a GD thin with that dum leperd skin background. wat a stoopid batch

6:30 AM

Blogger ginab said...

Yeah...spots before my eyes and nothing else, in Netscape. Give us our eyes!

I AM working out today. I am I am I am.

Today. Wooo!

contempt, I like that.

8:32 AM

Blogger honeyhive said...

I am not a netscaper and I can't read it either. I tried too, for a half hour and now I hvae a headache;)

10:12 AM

Blogger ing said...

Weird -- on my Mac, the spots weren't directly under the text. Okay, back to the original, and thanks.

11:06 AM

Blogger ginab said...


1:22 PM

Blogger honeyhive said...

Okay I can see it now.

1:34 PM

Blogger josh williams said...

Anyone in the market from a dead cow? FOP Australia

1:57 PM

Blogger Piers said...

Hey, Ing, just dropping by to say "hi." Heading over to the city for a couple of days to whoop in the New Year. Hope yours is crowded with life-stuff and material but no lonely surfers, oy?

11:16 PM

Blogger ing said...

What's wrong with lonely surfers, oy?

12:11 AM

Blogger josh williams said...

Looking for a donation of 864 (at least) commodes. Can anyone help me? Its for a very important global experiment I am working on,very cool stuff going on here.

2:40 PM

Blogger matty said...

Everything looked great on my iBook. ???

I am really wanting some Def L right now. I hear iTunes calling me back to the 80's!!! ...and, I guess some of the 90's, huh?

4:13 PM

Blogger ginab said...

weird is I have an iBook, but I cannot kick it with the Def L.

Now I'm crying on Ing's blog.


5:58 PM

Blogger ing said...


It looks great because I fixed something that didn't look great on everyone else's computer. Alles gut.

Def Lep, yes, creates a neat nostalgia, but o lordy I need to post something new. Which, soon.

Happy New Year, y'all.

1:11 AM

Blogger ing said...


You won't have to kick it for much longer, sweets. Oh, and I'll meet you at ginab's to tell you about auld lang syne.


I'm rounding up as many commodes as I can accommodate, but the pristine ones are a rare commodity. You're the man with the millions. Can't you get that hunky Roscoe kid to rope 'em in? I was thinking that I could supervise. . .

1:16 AM

Blogger ticharu said...

I was just comin' around this morning to wish you a happy new year, and saw the link, thanks Ing!

6:25 AM

Blogger ginab said...

Went 'spinning' this morning. Yikes!

Talk about kickin' it. And there's something profound about looking for the eye of the storm, so to speak, amid the breathing and the this and the sweating and the that, while listening to "Dancing in the Dark". Must be the most mindless lyrics of auld.

but show me the syne, Ing.

7:27 AM

Blogger SuperAmanda said...

Def Leppard was my mom's favorite band...I even know tracks on their first album;"On Through The Night."
Thank you for letting me indulge my hard rock smoking section chick side!

Happy New Year!

8:04 AM

Blogger josh williams said...

I need a bell helicopter and 24 landing pads. You done so well with the toilets. Thanks in advance and Happy New Year JWW

8:35 AM

Blogger Elaine said...

Wonderful blog my dear!

Thank you for paying a visit to mine too.

Def Leppard. Whilst I am in full admiration for a drummer who can play with just one arm, I think the band have set a dreadful example to young people - by deliberately spelling 'leopard' incorrectly.

It's not right. But it's okay!

Lots of love

Elaine x

12:11 PM

Blogger ginab said...

Coming in at 69 tales to clott the blood...

All my loving cold wet hands... dishwater, nothing less, mas authenticas, por los nuevo anos!

gracias mi compenara favorita,


2:21 PM

Blogger ing said...


Def Leppard was worried that if they called themselves "Deaf Leopard," people would assume they were a punk band, rather than the metal balladeers at whom we threw our Ms. Pac Man panties.

7:12 PM

Blogger ing said...


Happy, happy happy! I'm finally going to see Brokeback Mountain tonight, then it's off to a party.

I hope my friend Dirty Sanchez doesn't show up. I owe him twenty bucks.

7:15 PM

Blogger ginab said...


And, yeah, no...please what's his face, do not show up!

nothing like crying in the new year!

I hope you dance your shoes off! Sounds like a plan...go get'em doll!

10:43 PM

Blogger ing said...


I'm back, the bartender was most generous with the shots, everything was sparkly but blurred, the buses were free and the windows were fogged and I saw among other things a man with an unlit cigarette in his mouth sporting pajamas, my ass is grass, the table's set, there are leftovers in the freeze if you wan', I'm slurrrrring, pogue mahone, frijoles cahones y huevos, o man am I going to regret this in the morn, at the movie I regrettably bawled my eyes out which rendered me all puffy but maybe that's a kind of look? Anyhoo, the roomate and I raised a cup o' kindness to you and to Rachel, and a "whateva, you don't call" to a certain gentleman from Wales.

Peace, love, and ibuprofin,

2:15 AM

Blogger ginab said...

Ingy, Ingy, Ingy...cold compress to the bowling ball for a head this new years day. No football for you!

I feel fine. Two glasses of champagne only...and a little joy, is all, at home...driving my neighbors nuts by playing and replaying "Naive Melody". I had a dream about David Byrne. He wore a crazy colored jacket and a paper hat. He was about to sing to me...and he was so near I could have signed his nose, but Bea Bea pushed her nose into my hand...needing to do the duty. And she did proudly. Hunching, looking more solid, less mister frosty or dairy whip, every day.

Now that's an image would make you, hungover or not, want to avert your eyes, close them, pat the compress, lean back, and sleep.

10:43 AM

Blogger JackJumpedOverTheMoon said...


Happy New Year!! I wish you all the best in the coming year.

(It starts to sound insincere after a while, but I really do mean it. You are very cool and I hope you find whatever will make you deliriously happy this year.)


12:53 PM

Blogger josh williams said...

Sail Away:

Sail away with me honey
I put my heart in your hands
Sail away with me honey now, now, now
Sail away with me
What will be will be
I wanna hold you now

Crazy skies all wild above me now
Winter howling at my face
And everything I held so dear
Disappeared without a trace
Oh all the times I've tasted love
Never knew quite what I had
Little Darling if you hear me now
Never needed you so bad
Spinning round inside my head

Sail away with me honey
I put my heart in your hands
Sail away with me honey now, now, now
Sail away with me
What will be will be
I wanna hold you now

I've been talking drunken gibberish
Falling in and out of bars
Trying to find some explanation here
For the way some people are
How did it ever come so far

Sail away with me honey
I put my heart in your hands
Sail away with me honey now, now, now
Sail away with me
What will be will be
I wanna hold you now
Sail away with me honey
I put my heart in your hands
Sail away with me honey now, now, now
Sail away with me
What will be will be
I wanna hold you now

Repeat chorus This was the David Gray listened to while everyone sang along in Galway 1999 . I think he was off key, judging from my pitch.

9:19 PM


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